JABbering Stooge

Thursday, April 06, 2006

DeLay's pot to McKinney's kettle...you know the rest...

Oh, this is rich. Tom DeLay, the ethically-challenged Dr. Vahzilok of the Christo-Fascist Zombie Brigade who recently announced that he will resign his House seat in June because of possible impending indictment on official corruption charges in relation to convicted lobbyist Jack Abramoff, has announced that he will seek to file an ethics complaint against Congresswoman Cynthia McKinney for her assault on the Capitol Police officer who detained her for trying to sneak in to the Longworth House Office Building.

Responding to a reporter's question about McKinney at a press conference, DeLay said, "If nobody in this House files an ethics charge, I am...Her behavior is outrageous. And it’s not the only time."

And Jesus, weeping profusely, said, "Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye."

Seriously, Tom. Who are you trying to kid?! Do you honestly expect us to believe that McKinney's actions are more outrageous than wasting the FAA's time on a personal vendetta? More outrageous than money laundering? More outrageous than defending as "represent[ing] everything that is good about what we are trying to do in America" sweatshops in Saipan using wage-slave labor that has to go into prostitution on the side and are forced to have abortions if they become pregnant - one of many Abramoff-funded junkets? More outrageous than strong-arming K-Street into raising money for and contributing only to Republicans? More outrageous than blackmailing Rep. Nick Smith into voting for the expensive, Big Pharma-kickback-laden Medicare prescription drug plan? More outrageous than ordering the government to meddle in the private dispute between the family and husband of a blind, brain-dead woman, and then subsequently inciting violence against the judges who decided to follow the law for once rather than the personal agenda of a theocrat from Texas?! And that's just for starters. I could write a book just on the scandals, outrages, borderline and outright criminal behavior that DeLay has engaged in, and I probably still wouldn't scratch the surface!

But wait, the hypocrisy and double standards don't end there! DeLay also claimed that "Had it been Tom DeLay, the Ethics Committee would have met the next day."

Excuse me?! Somebody call out the WHAAAAmbulence for Mr. DeLay! Mr. Law-and-Order-Holier-Than-Thou-Ethics-Guru tried to have the House ethics rules changed to allow his pompous white ass to stay majority leader in the event that he should ever be indicted for ANYTHING WHATSOEVER! Fortunately for the survival of American democracy, the maneuver failed thanks to a rare show of Democratic backbone. But that didn't stop DeLay from trying to evade the long arm of the law. He then stacked the ethics committee with Congresscritters who had donated to his legal defense fund. To date, the ethics committee has not met even once since then.

It gets even more nauseating from there. The ever-unhinged Michelle Malkin provides us with this gem of a DeLay quote about the DeLay-McKinney flap:
Everything is racism to her.

To turn the tables a bit, "Everything is Christophobia to Tom DeLay." Thoughout all of his legal and ethical troubles, DeLay has constantly insisted that he is a political martyr second only to Jesus Christ Himself. DeLay was a headline speaker at all three of the "look at us poor persecuted Christians" Just Us Sunday masturbatory orgies, and was the keynote speaker at the recent "War on Christians and the Values Voters in 2006" wankfest where religious conservatives compared themselves to Jews in the Nazi death camps.

News flash to DeLay and his fellow travelers: 85% of Americans self-identify as Christians! The fact that you are not allowed to send gays, Muslims and liberals to the Zyklon-B showers does not mean that you are being fed to the lions! I really don't know why this is so hard to understand, but there it is.

These modern-day Pharisees may be surprised when they get to heaven and find their names absent from "The Book of Life." Fine. I'll engage in much schadenfreude when the time comes. But these people need to be voted out post haste. They are too dangerous to leave in power any longer.

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